We went to a memorial service last night. It wasn’t just for Dad, but for all people who had passed over time. It was held in a mausoleum. The inside was lit up with candles. Cold hard marble covered the floors and walls. Hundreds of people were there paying their respects to their loved ones. Songs and prayers filled the room. A candlelight vigil was held. As we walked through this mausoleum, candle in hand, I thought about life, death, my own mortality. Yesterday was Mom’s birthday. The week of the funeral, Lorelei made this for grandma.

What is mortality? How do we know when that time comes we have done everything in the world we had wanted to do? When my mother died, I was just a child. I am thankful that my father got to meet his grandkids. My mom didn’t have that option. I think about if something happens to me, how will my loved ones deal with their grief. Many people in my life have passed away. Many people in my life have gone away. People I have loved and lost and others who might have loved me.  We grieve for different things in many ways.  Some grief is short lived.  Other can last much longer.  Nothing can compare to losing a parent. They gave us life. They gave us a beginning. Our parents raise us the best they can. We don’t get rule books when we have a child. There are no owner manuals. We take what we have learned from our own parents and society and do our best. We never know how or when our death will happen. It is always very sad when it does. Losing both my parents has taught me to cherish each day. The people in our lives who have brought us trouble and sadness, we can shrug off and hope the best for them. The others who have been there for you through thick and thin, we hold on to and show them our love and gratitude. And our own children… we love them more each day and make every day the best it can be.

My son is well taken care of if my time comes sooner than I want it to. My stepmother will soon legally be my mother and our family will be okay.

What part of have some compassion and stop stalking me do you not understand?  You already know that my father has died so spend some of your manic energy on your own life and out of mine.  My life should be no concern of yours but since you insist on being in the middle of it, I am very upset about his death.  My family is having a hard time with this because it was so very sudden.  I am hurt.  I am numb.  Happy now?

I don’t understand why people feel the need to expend so much energy to something that they don’t even have a purpose for. What will stalking me do to you?  Does it save your conscience knowing that I am hurting and this makes your vindictive behaviors worth it?  Is it worth all the time and energy spent to nosy into  my life having to know every detail?  If you are that curious - just call.  I am sure you are resourceful enough to have gotten my number again.  I asked you kindly to stay out and leave me and my family be.  This is a hard time for us and I thank you for your concern, but send flowers, and find it somewhere in the void you call a heart to just leave us be.

THEVE, Robert

THEVE Robert L. “Bob”, 59, passed away at his residence on Monday, April 21, 2008. He was the son of the late Edwin L. and Mary Belle (Wright) Theve. Husband of Rita L. (Bohannon) Theve, father of Michelle Theve and Chris (Beth) Theve, grandfather of Matthew and Lorelei Theve and Catherine and Geoffry Sheldon, brother of Mary L. Theve, plus many other relatives and friends. Bob was a member of Avon Masonic Lodge, Hilltop DeMolay Chapter Mt. Healthy, the first Illustrious Knight Commander of Ohio State Priory (1970), Order of the Eastern Stars, Scottish Rite of the Valley of Cincinnati and the Grotto. He also served his country with the 123rd Air TAC USAFR Blue Ash, Ohio. Visitation will be Thursday 5-8 PM at the Vitt, Stermer & Anderson Funeral Home 4619 Delhi Rd. Funeral service Friday 10 AM at the funeral home. Interment will be at St. Joe New Cemetery, Delhi.

We buried him today. Last night I couldn’t even go near the casket. In fact I avoided it like the Bubonic Plague. As much as he put me through growing up and as much as I resented him for things that were done and said, he was still my father. I am the first born. I have now lost both of my natural parents. I am only 36. My stepmother has been married to my father for 19 years. I have known her longer than I knew my natural mother. My niece burst into tears the the service this morning when she realized Grandpa isn’t coming back. My son stayed strong all week for me until today at the cemetery and broke down during TAPS. The Masons did their service and Rev. Pat King officiated for us. He has known my father for 38 years. I felt so badly that I had forgotten to call my God-Father, John. He found out through the lodge though. I also found out that his wife has severe MS. She couldn’t make it. I found my father’s best friend. He made it. I still haven’t gotten a hold of Deanna, but I have an address for her and will stop by when I am out her way tomorrow. Both of my best friends from 7th grade were there with me. Michael was a life-saver.  My ex was there too. Mr. Jax, who manages Jack Ruby Enterprises, was also there. He knew my father quite well. He was a loved man. He had his faults, but who doesn’t. He was a husband, brother, father and grandfather. I can’t believe he is gone. I don’t want to believe it. Listening to my brother sleep in his chair made it seem even more unreal. I want to go back to Monday. I want this week to end. I want to have never existed. He will be greatly missed.

To my stalker - please have some compassion and consideration to stop stalking me while we are trying to deal with this. I don’t need the stress.

I miss you Dad.

Dad died suddenly Monday night.  It has been a very sad week.  I have now lost both of my parents but I am so happy to have my stepmother. The obituary was in the Cincinnati Enquirer yesterday.

Funeral arrangements for Dad

Visitation
Thursday April 24, 2008
5-8 PM
Vitt, Stermer & Anderson
4619 Delhi Pike
Cincinnati, OH 45238
(513) 921-0110

Internment
Friday April 25, 2008
St Joseph’s Cemetery on Covedale
10 AM at Vitt, Stermer & Anderson

In lieu of flowers, we are requesting donations to:
American Heart Association
2936 Vernon PL
Cincinnati, OH 45219
(513) 423-2142

Just died.

I love the drive-in. Where else can you go and watch 3 movies for $8, see old time cartoons, and watch retro intermission advertisement? We had a blast last night. Front row, curled up in camping chairs, weather just cool enough for a sweater and cuddled under blankets when it got cooler.Drillbit Taylor ***

This movie was fun for the whole family to watch. A little violent for the younger kids, but definitely amusing. Drillbit is a AWOL US Army man who is living on the streets. He takes his showers on the beach and feeds off the people of the city. The boys are your typical freshmen, new to a school, awkward, and out of place. The perfect target for the local school bully. The bullying gets worst as the weeks go on and the boys decided to hire a bodyguard. Drillbit takes the job on the notion this money will get him to Canada. A great movie about the trials and tribulations of youth, trust, and making new friends.

The Spiderwyck Chronicles *****

Great family movie. The Grace family moves into their Aunt’s creepy house in the middle of no where. The children are dealing with the break up of their parents. Jared decides to explore the things going bump in the house and finds a hidden room through the dumbwaiter. Goblins, hobgoblins, faeries and sylphs surround this tale of adventure and danger.

The Ruins ***

*NUDITY* The Ruins is about a group of college kids vacationing in Mexico. When they meet up with a German, their life gets more interesting. They go to visit an ancient Mayan ruin well off the maps. What they find there will change their life - if they live through it. Flowers that imitate phones and humans, flesh eating vines and some angry villagers make up this movie. While good, I wish someone would make a good scary movie!

Here are some more for your viewing enjoyment…

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Brandon sent me a site today that had some wonderful innovative ideas that I wanted to share with my readers. I only picked a handful that was on the page, but you can see all of them here.

Read the rest of this entry »

Akron was a nice get away although it is not the most interesting of cities.  We were there from Friday to Sunday.  The boys hung out in the pool and hot tub most of them time, while I was working the school open house.  We saw so many great kids there all weekend. There are all sorts of new ideas forming with the school.  With almost 3000 students now and more coming in the next term, it is the largest DELA school in the country.  The kids get so much one on one from their teachers and the teachers really care about the kids and help them to not fail.  They prepare them for college and even help out with other life issues as well.  I watched kids come through this weekend and saw how much they enjoyed their teachers and  enjoyed getting together with their classmates.  They did science and math experiments, participated in fun activities, saw how technology is advancing our children and spent the weekend learning.  Had I known as much back years ago as I do now, I would have followed through with enrolling him then.  It is amazing that the work is 20 times more difficult and yet he is getting all A’s and B’s.

In addition to our previous 80 degree weather, we had snow, sleet, rain and hail this weekend.  Now Mother Nature and G-D are officially in the divorce and the custody fight over the kids has not been pretty.  We went from blizzard to drownin, flooding rains, to hot weather, to more flash floods to snow again.  Remember temperament climate here!  Our crops are suffering and they are barely in the ground.  Corn prices went from $4 a bushel to over $6 due to the opening of a new corn ethanol plant.  The ground is too soggy to plant and if we ever do get it dry enough, we fear the frost will hit it again before summer hits and then we might lose them.  Then moving on to our normal summer drought which then the crops will suffer again because of thirst.  I was talking to a friend this morning about elections, our freedoms and liberties and how the popular vote still doesn’t count towards scat and he was telling about some things going on in Florida.  They passed an amendment at the beginning of the year to lower property taxes.  Property taxes in FL have always been high.  So this amendment passed, and now they are in a drought because rainy season doesn’t start for another month.  They are told that they are on water restrictions and yet the water companies come back at them saying they aren’t using enough water so they are going to place a high surcharge on their bill.  It is a catch-22.  When and where are we going to find a real balance in things?  Will our vote ever count?  When can we go back to robbing the rich to feeding the poor?  We live in the land of the free but our own civil liberties are challenged day after day.  You can’t do this, you have to pay this… but vote on this and we will fix it - only if the electoral college votes agree because you know, we don’t look at the popular vote.  Religion, politics, war, feast and famine.  And no I am not talking about the middle east.  I am talking about right here in our own country.  In the land of the free.

Have you guys heard the story about the pregnant man?

Advocate - Labor of Love

Last night on Inside Edition, they did a story on him and his wife. The baby is due in July. They went through countless doctors that said they were sick for doing this. Beatie is a transgendered male who chose to keep his female reproductive organs after he went through transition. He is married. Has a job, a home, and friends just like all of us. And he is carrying their baby. By looking at him, he is your normal nice looking guy. He and his wife, Nancy, look just the same as any other couple. But he is due to have their baby in July. Inside Edition covered the story very well without a lot of prejudice.

Letterman, on the other hand, did not. Tuesday night in his infamous top 10, he listed the following:

Top Ten Messages Left On The Pregnant Man’s Answering Machine

10. “I thought you said you were using protection”
9. “It’s Angelina Jolie. I’d like to adopt the baby”
8. “This is your wife — can I borrow your Gillette Mach 3 razor?”
7. “It’s Maury. I’d love to test to see if you’re the mother and/or the father”
6. “Ralph Nader here. I’ve had sex with myself for years and never got pregnant”
5. “It’s Maury. Again, seriously, how fast can you get here?”
4. No number 4 — writer still stuck on JetBlue flight — what’s it been, like a year?
3. “Michael Moore here. People ask me if I’m pregnant too”
2. “This is Dr. Phil. We should talk”
1. “Michael Jackson here — just wanted to reach out to another androgynous freak show”

Maybe it is just me? Maybe I am one of those people who are out of the norm? I think what Letterman did was crude and uncalled for. Granted the man doesn’t have a lot of couth sometimes when it comes to subjects of sensitive nature, but come on, Beatie is having this baby because his wife cannot conceive. What is wrong with that? Maybe it is the fact that more men on the planet would be horrified and view women differently if they were able to get pregnant and go through childbirth. I have given birth, I know what it is like. I have many transgendered male friends and to me they are men - period. They have the mentality of a man, the patience of a man, and are the prime existence of a man. Why should this couple be stricken down and told they are sick for bringing a child into this world? They are doing what G-d gave us the right to do.

Beatie appeared on Oprah today and was quoted, “It’s not a male or female desire to have a child. It’s a human desire,” a thinly bearded Thomas Beatie said. “I have a very stable male identity,” he added, saying that pregnancy neither defines him nor makes him feel feminine.

His wife Nancy has said that that their role as parents will not be different. He will still be the father and she will be the mother. Their little girl will be loved and cherished as any child should be. Their child wasn’t an “oops sorry honey, I’m pregnant!” It was carefully planned out, researched, and tried multiple times before they were successfully able to carry. In fact his first pregnancy was ectopic triplets that caused him to go through a painful surgery. This alone tells me that this couple isn’t doing it for the media attention. Of course it would get out into the media. Our society can’t handle anything that is beyond their idea of norm.

So what do you think? Were they right in creating this child? What are the pros and cons? How will this child differ from any other child out there? What did Oprah say? She called it “a new definition of what diversity means for everybody.”